Did The Easter Bunny Come?

Happy Easter everyone. How are we dealing with staying home, staying safe? I admit I am enjoying and hating this at the same time. I am still working. I spend my evenings and weekends at home watching Netflix, reading, doing crosswords, drinking shandies and spending time with my sweetie.

My mind wanders and when it does my anxiety kick in.  Whenever I sneeze or cough, I think am I getting sick. I don’t have a fever so I am fine.

I have a friend who developed COVID and he has since recovered. He returned in mid March from an epic driving adventure with his family. I have known him for about 25 years, however, our friendship only developed over the last five years. It is a very strong bond.

My friends are small in quantity and huge in quality. I cherish my interaction with each and everyone of them. They are the type of friends who if you call at 3:00 am they ask how can I help you not why are you calling. The support, love and respect we have for each other is special. Now more than ever it is important to check in and maintain contact. When this is all over the things settle down to the normal the new normal we will celebrate and revel in each other’s company. I will wait and cherish these moments.

The new normal will be limited number of people in shops and stores. Limited number of people in restaurants and theatres. Sporting events will return under physical distancing protocols. We will forever be indebted to our front line workers who kept life churning and saving lives.

What we considered important or who we considered important is changing. The last to change will be the people who thought they were the most important. They are the least likely to adapt to the new normal. Waiting in line to enter a store will be considered beneath them.

I think of when this is over and how the world is changing. I think of how practising good MentalHealth will have gotten me through this. The three things I am missing our giving my grandson and stepdaughter a huge hug not wanting to let go. I am missing my daily ordeal of sports all aspects and I am missing hands on volunteering with my many organizations.

I am longing for the end of this, hopefully by September. Stay Strong, stay healthy, stay home, stay positive and be kind always.

I Am Grieving Today

Today is April 6, 2020 day 23 of physical distancing, doing our part to flatten the curve. I go to work, I come home. On weekends, I come home Friday and don’t leave the house until Monday morning.  The highlight of the past week when I went to get meds from the pharmacy and found toilet paper on the shelf.  I felt like I had won the lottery.

I am grieving several things today. Today would have been the championship of college basketball. I would be at a bar with friends cheering and watching. Instead I am reliving great championship moments. The first championship I watched was 1979 final won by Kentucky over Duke. That day I became a Kentucky fan. I remember Michael Jordan’s game winning shot in 1982 for UNC over Georgetown. The 1985 perfect game upset Villanova over Georgetown. 1983 NCST upset over Houston with Jim Valvano running all over the court looking for someone to hug. 1990 UNLV annihilate Duke 102-73 largest margin of Victory. 1996 Kentucky 36-2 the Untouchables start of 3 straight title game appearances. Lost in 1997 to Arizona and beat Utah in 1998. Who can forget Gordon Hayward half court heave that bounced out or else Butler would have won over Duke in 2010. Sadly this year no tournament.

I am also grieving today on the 2nd anniversary of the Humboldt Bus Crash which took 16 lives and touched the fabric of Canada deeply. Almost everyone could relate to riding the buses for games, camps, music festivals, dance recitals and on and on. I hurt badly that day and for the days that came afterwards. I was numb. Couldn’t move from my home for days. I wept and remembered the bus rides I took for basketball, soccer, rugby and hockey games across the prairies. In small towns the local junior hockey teams were revered. They became the soul and heartbeat of the town. The players were stars. The tragedy galvanized the country, within hours a Go Fund Me page was set up and raised over $16 million. It was dispersed to all the families affected. Hockey sticks were left out on porch’s for the boys. Everyone in Canada was affected by the tragedy and still are.

I am grieving today missing sports on a daily basis. Watching games live or on TV, following the scores, read stories and do sports wagering. Hockey, basketball playoffs would be starting, Soccer seasons winding down and gearing up. Spring is a busy sports time and I miss it. 3 Hall of Farmers died this weekend. Al Kaline played all 22 years with Detroit Tigers, 10 Gold Gloves over 3,000 hits.
Bobby Mitchell halfback Cleveland Browns and was first black player in Washington Football history. Was VP of football operations after career ended and was passed over for GM because of his colour. He spent post football career championing equally throughout the DC community. Tom Dempsey born with no right toes had a great career as a place kicker for New Orleans Saints. Had a special shoe. Kicked straight on and held the record for longest field goal in NFL at 63 yards in 1970 until it was surpassed in 2013.

Keep safe, physical distancing and stay home. We will come through this better and stronger.

We Will Get Through This

How is everyone doing? I tell you my confidence is shaken, my mental health wavers. Somedays I feel like we can beat this soon. Other days like today, we have another 25 confirmed COVID 19 cases. A sobering reality, that it may get worse before it gets better.

The real heroes are the front line staff, health care workers, truck drivers, grocery store cashiers, maintenance and custodians. This virus is non discriminatory and affects everyone. The so called important people are learning that they are not as important now as they thought they were. The people with money and power are finding out that they are not that powerful or valuable as they thought.

We will get through this and than life will return to normal or some variation of normal. We all have a role to play.  That role is to stay at home, no unnecessary trips or errands to run. This one is hard for me, my wife says I love running errands. This is true.

It has always been said that when times get tough, true leaders and friends emerge. We are seeing evidence of this on all levels. Many people are stepping up and helping out. Businesses are repurposing to meet the demand.

Even if we can’t physically see people and socialize, social media is a great way to stay connected. Reach out to at least 3 people in your network each day. It is great for our mental health. If you have a balcony, backyard go outside for a few minutes.

We overlook a creek and the geese have come back. It is great to hear them and see them interact. It’s the little things that matter and make a difference. We can and will get through this. Hopefully by September. Cheers everyone and STAY Safe and POSITIVE.

If you hit a wall while self isolating, does it make a sound...

A few short weeks ago very few of us had heard the following adages: flattening the curve, self isolate, social and physical distancing. Now they have become welcome editions to our daily language.

If we follow the advice behind the words we will get through this phase much quicker. Scientists are saying that the earth is healing with less pollution, emissions etc. We need to keep doing our part to ease the pandemic.

After 2 weeks of physical and social distancing, I hit a wall today. My anxiety spiked.

I realized I am missing my daily supplement of sports live action. All types. Whether I watch, read, scroll or listen to scores, games reports. It was a daily fix for me.  Several times a week I would sports bet on various games. Winning occasionally, losing some. It kept me with proverbial skin in the game. At least twice a week I would go to an establishment for a drink and watch games and do crossword puzzles. The only part I am still doing is crossword puzzles. One sport over the last couple of years taken a serious interest in is curling. No surprise Shelley is the Uber curling fan. I now have favourite curlers who I cheer for like my favourite teams. I was so looking forward to Liverpool’s first premier league title in 30 years. I was looking forward to March Madness, a year where the champion was a smaller school from a lesser known conference. My favourites were Gonzaga, Dayton and San Diego St. It was going to be the year of the Bucks in the NBA and a redemption in NHL with Tampa Bay winning.

It has not been since I broke my ankle in 2015 that I have spent so much time at home. Don’t get me wrong I love our place and I love Shelley and I spending time here. Thank God for NetFlix and shandies (seven up and red wine). Cabin fever has set in.

I also am missing volunteering. Had 3 events cancelled and more in April and May cancelled. My mental health is beginning to wane. My anxiety has spiked and my mood is low. Unfortunately one of my triggers for this is the Orange Menace who can’t seem to or doesn’t want to listen to anyone except his own opinions. Everything he says is a lie, his actions are inactions. It is frustrating depressing and sickening watching him. I try to avoid him. It is an impossible task.

What gives me hope is the kindness of strangers going the extra mile to help others. We can do our part. We have to physically and social distance and flatten the curve. Companies repurposing themselves to help out. Distillers/Breweries making hand sanitizer, Bauer hockey making surgical masks, Canada Goose making hospital scrubs to name a few. Everybody working hard to do their part. #BeKindToOthers

Really...The Dawn Of A New Era

On Friday I drove to work a drive that usually takes 20-30 min took 15-17 min. The streets are so bare it seemed like something out of the Apocalypse. I work in healthcare and deemed essential.

Usually my social calendar would be full and would be lucky to have 1 night off a week where I can stay home. Now I am staying home and not even thinking of going out. Social distancing at its finest.

We have been enjoying Netflix with wine shandies. We went to the local supermarket on Friday as well. Everyone was practicing social distancing. Every second cashier was closed. Customers were creating separation amongst themselves.  Once again the toilet paper, Lysol wipes were sold out and the bread aisle was sold out. I don’t get it, hoarding needs to stop. Stores are opening up earlier to allow the vulnerable and elderly to shop for essentials. Good for them. However, hoarding is still going on with people who can shop later shopping during this time. Shame on you.

We are in unprecedented times everyone show compassion and kindness. Yes there are great examples. A husband and wife went out for dinner at a restaurant in Houston the meal cost $90 they left a $9000 tip for all the staff working there. A landlord in Wisconsin advised his tenants that they only need to pay $100 for rent in April. People offering to run errands for those less fortunate. Be kind at all times.

I emailed my property owner and ask for a $100 discount on rent for next month. I was rebuked swiftly and promptly.  So much for them doing their part.

Right now I am felling healthy physically and mentally. This could change. In order to maintain our health the easiest way is to be kind, be supportive and check in with one another. We will get through this. It will take time. In the meantime everyday go outside at 7pm and applaud all the wonderful people in health care, maintenance, cleaning, truck drivers and emergency personnel organizations

#BeKindToEachOther

I Don’t Get It and Yet I Do

I consider myself a fairly smart man, socially aware and responsible, although sometimes my partner  might disagree. I sincerely don’t get the rush to horde toilet paper. This COVID-19 is a respiratory virus and yes self isolating and social distancing are real aspects of today’s reality.

However, toilet paper being hoarded really. It was comforting to see resale websites such as  Kijiji and Amazon have stop posting people trying to make an obscene profit off toilet paper. In our house we are good for about 2 weeks of regular use. The world might be an entirely different place in 2 weeks.

On Tuesday September 11, 2001 the World changed due to 911. We adapted and adjusted and life continued. On Wednesday March 11, 2020 the World changed again. Sports came to an abrupt end, travel plans were abruptly altered, mass gatherings of over 250 people have been cancelled or postponed. New words quickly entered our vocabulary and society. Self-isolating and social distancing became the buzz words.  Hoarding of supplies became common practice.

This past weekend gone out a couple of time's as my partner says “to run errands”.  Regularly it would be to buy sports betting tickets, well so much for that. This time for other errands, the roads are bare, McDonald’s drive thru I was the only one. Thank you Netflix for helping pass the time.

The work week will come quickly enough and we will see what it brings. Everything is fluid and active now. Remaining positive will be tough yet essential. Maintaining a sense of normalcy whatever that looks like is important. Being aware and responsible is key. I am going to everything I can to stay active, positive, kind and supportive and healthy. Life will carry on. It may get worse before it gets better. Life will carry on.

It Was A Struggle...I Did It

Starting the new year I set a goal for m6self of showering 2 times a week. For the month of a January I accomplished this task, however, it was not easy.  Each time I showered I wrote the date on the calendar it felt good to achieve this goal. Especially since a January was a tough month mentally, physically, emotionally and spiritually.

February came and I thought this would be easy. The third day in I showered felt good empowered and emboldened. Well then reality set in. Over a week went by before another shower. I failed myself, felt crappy, beat myself up. I showered just to prove I could. It was not therapeutic and over after about a few minutes. Shortest time I can recall. I felt even worse. Another few days I tried again got into the tub and couldn't turn on the tap. I froze, I wanted to scream and cry. I felt ashamed.

The next day I was desperate for a shave and shower. I shaved, washed my hair in the kitchen sink and hand washed myself. The next several weeks every few days this was my routine.

It is now March 11, I finally did it. I showered.i prepared myself all day. No fear, no anxiety. The water felt relieving as it flowed over my body.  I stood under the nozzle and soaked it all in. Felt alive and refreshed.

I fully understand that my feeling may be fleeting and short lived.

I have read many articles and talked to many professionals and friends. For people with mental health issues the simple task of showering can be the hardest to do. It is hard to explain, it just is.

Tomorrow hopefully will be a good day.