Saving Grace

This weekend marks the 4rth anniversary of Robin Williams death by suicide. At the time, I like most others was shocked to hear of his passing. A terrific comedic genius gone too soon.  From his stand up routines (my favourites were his dissection of the sport of golf and his appearance on Johnny Carson's penultimate show) to his comedic movies again my favourites (Good Morning Vietnam and Mrs. Doubtfire) to his portrayal of John Keating in Dead Poets Society.

What we didn't see was his inner struggles, his pain, his hurt. All of this was clearly on display in his films, stand up routines. However, it was masked so that we couldn't see through all the laughter, immersion of his characters.

When someone dies by suicide, it is to end ones suffering, ones pain. It is not a Sign of Weakness. I once came close 18 years ago. April 2000, I was alone in a hotel room sitting in the dark thinking of how no one would miss me if I never came home.

What stopped me was the TV was on and CNN was showing live coverage of a reunion between a boy and his father.  I reached out to my father. One of the toughest phone calls I ever made. My father reacted with no judgement and asked how he could help. He was even prepared to jump on the next plane and come and get me.

I am forever grateful to my father and the story of Elian Gonzalez for saving me.

Everyone has a story and we don't know what that story is. So be kind and be prepared to reach out when someone is in need. You could be there saving grace.

Robin Williams entertained millions and only a few saw his daily struggle. The struggle is real.

For the last 3 years, I have had the privilege of sharing my story to middle and senior high school students. Each time after sharing there is a comment and question and answer session. One student wrote a comment how they were pleased that I was here to share my story that day.

Everyday I am grateful and thankful that I am here and that my openness with depression could help even 1 person.  This is what keeps me going everyday.